wedding of the century?

doubtful. i've already booked biosphere 2 for 2035. and? things are pretty serious with Charlie Davies-Carr. eat it, middleton.

says here

"may cause lightheadedness"...

but i'll give it a shot. the website says it's safe in small doses,

and self-medicating has treated me well in the past. 

pretty sure that was straight up absinthe.

aargh!

adios

the broad behind me is taking dad and going away "just for a little while." and tells me i "won't even know" they're gone.

and she calls herself a mother...

i will backhand you, serena!

totally stole the outfit i had planned for easter:
http://mit.zenfs.com/218/2011/04/serena-williams-return-11-pink.jpg

nuff said

once the number three,

being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy holy hand grenade of antioch towards thy foe, who being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it. amen.

selfies

mess with dad

and you mess with me.